I have finally put my grandson down for his nap (he fights his sleep...at six months old) and hub is taking a nap....the house is quiet...
Then it donged on me....It is August 1st...!!!! What happened to June and July?
I remember growing up, I thought time went by so slowly. I always wanted time to hurry up. Boy, what was I thinking???? I
I am not in one bit of a hurry now a days. With hub's cancer returning, it has caused me to stop and just take it slow. My father use to tell me to stop and smell the roses because I was always rushing around...jokingly I responded it is nervous energy...I am hyper. I must admit, it has taken me awhile to slow down. I kinda enjoyed the fast pace, but I kinda enjoy the slower pace. My calendar is now blank with just doctor appointments written down. A few years ago, every space was filled with appointments, engagements, etc. to attend. I would fret if I had an empty date. I was also OCD when it came to housekeeping, schedules, and such. People use to tell me instead of being OCD, I was CDO (completely in order). My house had to be in complete order...cleaning at least 2 to 3 times a week and I had a schedule for everything. Not now... I don't mean to sound as if hub's cancer is great, but the cancer has taught me to slow down. Cancer has taught me to appreciate the good days...and take advantage of them. Cancer has taught me it is okay for my house not to be spic and span clean. There were so many plans we had....now we don't plan ahead. I would never be a spur of the moment person, but now I am...if hub is having a good day...we go.
Cancer has a way of humbling one. A few weeks ago, hub's scans were not good. I knew the moment the doctor walked in the room, she dreaded telling him the news....the chemo wasn't working, the tumors were growing, we are between a rock and a hard spot. Man this was a tough pill to swallow. I was crying and I said it wasn't fair...I thought we were good people, what on earth is happening!! Hub responded by saying, "You know what's not fair?" "What?",I responded. "A little child having cancer, that's what isn't fair. I am 62 yrs old." Shew, this got to me...quit thinking about the what ifs...and our plans..
Cancer sure has thrown us a curve ball. But we are still playing the game.
Have a great week. Enjoy Life