Basketball

Hub and I returned home from Duke with not so good news.  It was a long drive home....not much talking but a lot of crying.  It is okay to cry.  When we got home, I just couldn't stand being in the house so I persuaded hub to attend our local high school's basketball game.  We both needed to get away.  Hub is a people person so he needed this therapy!  Our local high school team won!

In the background is little man sitting with future son-in-law and daughter.  Hub is coming down the bleachers.

Valentine's Day was spent with this guy.

He has stolen my heart....

I can't believe is already a month old. I just love him like no other love.

I had shirts made for hub, Blake, and myself.  

The other grandchildren call hubs Buddy.  They have never called him Pap, or Pap paw only Buddy!! Having this guy visit, gets our mind off of that 'C' word.

Since our local high school team won, they played Friday night.  Hub and I wanted to go.  We, well more like hub has gotten close to a couple of players. On the way to the game, hub began crying.  After waiting a few minutes, I questioned him.  He was worried about dying....so I told him it was okay to cry BUT Cancer was not going to steal our joy. So cry and then let it go.  The game was great and our local team won!  One of the players and his girlfriend wanted their picture made with hub.

Hub calls them his grandchildren.

Saturday, we went to watch little man, Nate, play basketball.

Oldest daughter tagged along.

Watching 3rd-5th graders play basketball....is a hoot!!  Much laughter and a few coaching techniques from hub was heard.  

I think we have a future basketball player.....at least he looks like one!

The weather is very much springlike here...after the rain.  Temps are going to be in the high 70s this week.  Daughter#2 is going to bring little Blake down and go for a stroll.  

What a great idea I told her!

Enjoy your day. I am!

Wednesday Hodgepodge

Happy Valentine's Day

1. When's the last time you had a heart to heart talk with someone? A change of heart? Experienced figurative 'heart failure?'
   
I have a heart to heart talk with Jesus every morning. Some people refer to it as their prayer time, but I feel like I am in a conversation more than prayer.
I almost experienced heart failure Monday. Amanda, oldest daughter, Emily and little Blake, and I went to pick up Amanda's wedding dress. Emily was so happy to get out of the house and actually go somewhere besides going to doctor appointments. Blake slept all the way. He was still asleep when we got to the wedding dress shop so I happily volunteered to stay in the car with him :)  Daughters could not had been in David's Bridal more than 10 minutes when Blake began waking up. At first, he began to whimper so I talked to him. The flu is raging so we all were in agreement t to not get him in crowds. The whimper turned into a cry then the cry turned into a scream. I tried to get him out of the car seat but I didn't know how to unbuckle the dang thing. By this time, Blake's scream had turned into a full screaming fit! I texted daughter and she came right out. Within seconds the screaming subsided; he just wanted to be coddled. Shew! This was one time I was glad for cell phones! Blake calmed down, daughter went back in store to see her sister in her wedding gown and I held Blake till he fell back asleep. All was well.


2. Champagne, chocolates, flowers...what's your Valentine pleasure? Any special plans for the day?
 
No special plans for the day.

3. Are you a hopeless romantic or do you fall more in the category of practical and pragmatic? What's a gesture you find romantic?

I am a practical romantic.
I find it romantic to just snuggle and hold hands while watching a movie....sometimes it is the little things that are romantic. One time, hub returned home after he had just left a few minutes because he forgot to kiss me goodbye.

4. Do you ask a lot of questions in life or are you pretty content with what you already know?
 
Right now in this season of life, I ask a lot of questions.

5. Your favorite power ballad?
 
"Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now"

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Hub didn't receive the news we wanted to hear yesterday at Duke but...
https://youtu.be/3wxyN3z9PL4

Wednesday Hodgepodge

1.February can be a little bit tricky given the weather and the winter and the whatnot. I read a list (here) of things you can do to make your February brighter which included-start planning your next trip, take more baths, make your own chocolate covered strawberries, and exercise in preparation for swimsuit season. Anything on the list you might try? Which suggestion on the list appeals to you most? Tell us something not on the list that helps make your February brighter. 

I would have to go with exercising.  I enjoy going to Zumba class even though it has been cancelled a few weeks due to sickness, weather, and water leaks!
Planning my next trip is more appealing to me but when and where is another question.

2. Tell us about something you've seen or done recently that you'd say was 'super'?

Holding my little one.....the best feeling

3. Best thing you ate in a 'bowl' last week?

Chicken noddle soup

4. Something you're 'cheering' for right now?

Great doctor reports.

5. The Winter Olympics begin Friday, February 9th in Pyeong Chang, South Korea. On a scale of 1-10 (with 10 being all in and 1 being no interest whatsoever) how interested are you in the games? Which event do you most want to see (you'll find a list here).

I enjoy watching the Olympics.  Ice Skating and Skiing are my favorites. Also, enjoy the opening ceremonies, that is if I can stay awake.

6. Insert your own random thought here.

Hoping for a great doctor appointment for hub on Tuesday at Duke.

I cry, I pray, and I smile

Emotional Rollercoaster

and I want to off!!

Cancer is trying to steal my joy.

I cry, I pray,  I smile, and life goes on.....

Hub was asked to speak to Chilhowie's Basketball Team a couple of weeks ago.  It was Coaches Against Cancer Game.  I hate the word Cancer. Hub was nervous, but delighted that the coach asked him.  Hub and I arrived at the game earlier than normal. He wanted to prepare and look over his notes.  The time approached for his speech, and he tore up his notes and spoke from his heart.  After his speech, he sat down with me and was smiling.  The announcer asked for any spectators that has/had been affected by cancer to stand.  Hub stood and one player ran to his mom and hugged her and another player ran across the gym floor to hug hub.  Hub began crying and people behind me began crying. 

My heart was breaking....I try to be strong but my heart is breaking.  Hub is in the fight of his life for the second time.

Cancer is trying to steal our joy!

Hub had scans last Tuesday at Duke.  He had scans on November 7th and the report showed the tumors were shrinking.  Tears of joy flooded my heart and ran down my cheek.  The scans last week, weren't so good. More tumors were found in his liver, and the tumor on his stomach according to numbers had grown but was stable.  How can something be stable but the numbers change????  I have been feeding hubs healthy foods....very little red meat, a lot of green vegetables, a lot of sunflower seeds and almonds for snacks....all the good 'stuff' so how can this scan be not so good????? Again, I tell myself to be strong and not let hub see my worry face or any tears.  It was a long 4 hr drive home. We return to Duke next Tuesday to see the next step in this journey. My stomach hurts, my head hurts, and the tears fall.  An emotional roller coaster ride....and I want to stop at the top of the high and stay there! 

Cancer is trying to steal our joy.  Now in our life stage, when most people are enjoying their retirement, enjoying taking trips, smiling over their accomplishments of life, hub and I worry.  What is the next step?  What is cancer doing now to his body?  How long does hub have to live?  Why won't this cancer go away????

I am going to sub the remainder of the week for a friend.  I don't mind because I get to see

this special fellow..Nate. 

 Hub's son does not allow us to see him anymore.  I raised this young man from birth to now BUT now we don't see him.  When hub and I returned home from Duke last May, hub was still very weak....he had lost 70lbs in 4 weeks.  Nate asked to spend the night and I said he could but Hub's son, Todd, has another son, Camden (4yrs old) by another woman and he asked to spend the night.  I explained that taking care of hub (he was still sick at night) was hard and one boy could spend the night and the next night the other boy could spend the night. Todd, hub's son, replied it was a package deal and if both boys couldn't stay, than no one stayed.  So Todd does not allow us to see the boys. He has stolen joy from hub and my heart breaks. When I get a chance to sub, I go. Nate is happy to see me at school, and I get a hug and a smile.  Did Cancer rob us of seeing the boys? 

I have bought both boys their Valentine gifts.

I pray both boys will be safe, and they will always know how much hub and I love them.

Daughter and her little one, Blake, is doing great.  He is having some reflux issues and goes to the doctor today.  Daughter is very cautious with the flu epidemic which I admire her for her caution.  

My heart melts and smiles when she sends us pictures of him.  It seems he grows everyday. So far a brief moment, cancer isn't in my thoughts.

So today is my day to cry, to pray out to God, and to smile.  Life goes on. 

But I know this....

Have a great day.....

Enjoy Life